I am who i am

This is me, This is who i am

I teach English Online and today the comment of one parent whose daughter I taught really upset me. I don’t create the lesson or book the students. All I do is let China know when I am available to teach they or the student book me and book the lesson. All I do is login look at the lesson and teach it.The student is able to view the lesson before I teach it,if they don’t like it they can cancel. I was booked to teach an 8 year old Level 2 girl about using These and Those in a sentence. I had taught this lesson before and new that it was advanced for this level however I have no choice but to teach it.I started the lesson on time, I did the usual of asking the student about there day, What they like etc.I started with the lesson. I knew exactly how much time I needed to spend on each slide to finish within the allocated 25 minutes. I patiently read with the child, corrected her English where needed, guided her etc.I did all this while she was having network problems and going in and out of the lesson. I contacted I.T to help her while trying to teach her. When we reached 25 minutes and the lesson was not yet finished. I typed up in the lesson for her parents to see that I would continue with the lesson and finish it because of the technical problems they were having. I patiently taught her for an additional 15 minutes which I am not supposed to do.Only to have the father leave a complaint about the lesson, my teaching, his network problems and in between it all he said my body looked inappropriate. How he could tell who knows when all they could see was my head.What made him think it was OK to say this?. On top of it the other day I was teaching a junior who typed in Chinese too fat. I mean wow. Yes I am fat, yes i am overweight but what that has to do with English, I don’t know.What gives people the right to speak to someone like that.I am not the healthiest of eaters but I don’t eat lots, I don’t eat lots of junk or take always.I am however a comfort eater.How would he feel if someone said that to his daughter, wife, sister mother, himself and so on.

I may not have been born fat but I put on a lot of weight after I had my son. I was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes, Endometriosis and Asthma.People who have Endometriosis battle to lose weight.

I am who I am

My son was born with a Mild Mental disability and grew up with people thinking it was OK to tell him he was stupid. What makes people think they can speak to someone else like this.

I have people telling me on a daily basis that I am fat and they think it is OK to do so. Do they not think that I see myself in the mirror or everyday. I am so ashamed of my body because of people doing this as someone said you start to hate yourself but I am who I am and you are considered rude if you point out that they are also fat. I mean how dare you turn the tables on them, they are not rude, it was OK for them to do it but how dare you return the favour, I mean that’s just rude. I exercise daily especially because I don’t have a car and probably exercise more than most skinny people.

You mustn’t say something you wouldn’t want said to yourself.

In the words of The Nobel Peace Price winner and legendary poet the late Dr Maya Angelou “people will forget what you said but they won’t forget how you made them feel “.

We are born looking the way we are and you can not change it. We are not born judgemental but we learn how to be.

I am so tired of being judged by others who don’t even know me. Who just presume that I eat a lot and don’t exercise or that my son is stupid. When you say something like that to another person you are setting yourself up for embarrassment when they achieve something better than you ever will.

Why do people have to be so judgemental?. I am tired of being made to feel worse about myself so that they can feel better.

Quotes from a legend

I came across the following quote by Martin Luther King and really liked it as I feel it is so true. The quote is “Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase’. I feel like I often don’t see the whole staircase and I battle to just have trust and have faith sometimes.
There are a lot of quotes by Martin Luther King Junior that I love and I have chosen these next four to share with you.


1. “To ignore is to become it’s accomplice”.
This quote is so true when you ignore evil and evil things that people do. You are not helping them or anyone.Sometimes weust not be afraid to speak up.


2. “The time is always right to do what is right”.
It is never to late to do the right thing sometimes doing the right thing means making the decisions other people don’t want to make or can’t handle.


3. ” I have decided to stick with love, hate is to great a burden to bear”.
Some people sadly choose hate over love and battle to forgive, not realising that sometimes forgiveness can heal the wounds you never knew were there.


4. “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter”


One thing I do not do is keep quiet about things that matter and I am always being told I have a big mouth. If it is important why should I or anyone keep quiet.

A legend gone to soon

Today South Africans woke up to the sad news that a Jazz Legend had passed away. His name was Raymond Chikapa Enock Phiri. He was born on the 23rd March 1947 in a south African town called Nelspruit,Mpumalanga. He was born to a Malawian immigrant and South African guitarist nicknamed ” Just Now” Phiri. He was a founding member of the Cannibals in the 1970s.

When Cannibals group broke ray founded another group called Stimela with whom he received gold and platinum selling albums like fire, passion and ecstacy (1991, look, listen and decide (1992).

In 1985 Paul Simon asked Ray along with Ladysmith Black Mambazo to join the now popular Graceland project. Which was successful and also helped the South African musicians to make a name for themselves abroad. He was to collaborate with Simon again on Simon’s Rhythm of Saints Album.Which awarded him the opportunity to perform on stages such as Central park and Madison Square Garden. As well as appearing in television shows in the U.S.A. In 2012 Paul Simon organised a Graceland anniversary tour, in which Ray participated in making it once again the success that it was in bringing the now Best Friends back together once again.

He had many achievements and awards for his recognition in the music industry. One these awards is called the Ikhamanga which was awarded to him by the then South African president.

He was involved in a series of car accidents. He was badly injured 1987 in crash that claimed the lives of his band manager and six others. In 2003 he sadly lost his wife in a car accident where he escaped serious injury. 

He died this morning at a Nelspruit hospital after a battle with Lung Cancer. He leaves behind 3 Sons and Five Daughters.

Never Give Up

Often people give up to easily on things instead of just trying to push through and succeed. My son and I have recently had more than one thing where we have succeeded and if we had given up it would never have happened. I am so glad we never gave up even though we wanted to. The one was getting his SASSA Disability Grant and the other was getting him into college.

My son had been receiving his disability grant from the time he was about ten years old. I received it from them on his behalf. The procedure then was good and simple. You would go in there get the forms make the appointment to see the doctor in three months which was the waiting period. On the day of your appointment you would go in with whatever doctors information you had. He would look at it and look at your child and then submit everything for a decision to be made. A month before my sons eighteenth birthday. I phoned SASSA to find out what happens after he turns eighteen.I was told that we would have to reapply and that it would be a simple process. My son turned 18 on the 10th of December 2016. Just before he turned eighteen I took off work and we went into the offices to get the forms and to make the appointment for the SASSA Doctor. We were told that we would have to go to the clinic and get the forms filled in. Which we tried the first doctor at Edenvale Clinic refused to help us in fact he was really rude.We then eventually found a clinic on the outskirts of Alexandra township and started going there. The doctors there are amazing. The next problem was the SASSA doctor because even though the Alex doctors filled in a form and could see he had a problem they kept declining his grant. The doctors at the clinic would feel sorry every time we went there with new forms.We thought of giving up but the doctors at the clinic and my sons gran convinced us not too and guess what it took a year and a half but we got approved for a six month grant. My son is learning disabled and so he qualifies for a disability grant.

The other we never gave up on was him being able to go to college. He has always wanted to be a chef and run his hotel. We started looking at colleges about two years ago. We eventually found one where he could go with his grade 10 certificate and study hospitality and then cooking but the next problem was how to pay. We decided this year to take a leap of faith and register and apply for a bursary. He sadly did not qualify for the bursary but our consultant who we had been dealing with saw how desperate we were for him to study. He had heard of a sponsor looking to sponsor a child and put Tristan’s name down. They met with my son briefly and approved his sponsorship.

We never knew how either of these things were going to happen but we never give up. Whatever it is in life you want but don’t know how to get don’t give up.

Triumph

What would you do if you knew you could never fail but only succeed.

If you could do anything and you new you were not going to fail what would you do?.

I teach English online and this question was in one of my lessons and it got me thinking. Then we were given a challenge by daily post to write an article on triumph.

What would I do if I could do anything and not fail but triumph?. The sky’s the limit. Would I start that business that I have wanted to start. Would I be brave enough to maybe jump out of a plane. What would I do?. What would you do?. Would I quit my job and just travel?. 

I think I would feel brave enough to do anything because all I could do is Triumph and succeed.  I could maybe be a singer. Who knows maybe I would be the next Whitney Houston.

What would I achieve?. What have I been able to achieve in my life?. Triumph means victory and achievment and to be successful. 

If I look back on my life what have I achieved. Well I have managed to raise an amazing son all on my own. I would say thus is my biggest achievement, greatest success and triumph. It was not easy as my son is mild mentally disabled but if you spoke to him you would never know it.He is also dyslexic and ADD but he can read a 1000 page book in just few days. He will always aim to triumph despite his disabilities.

My next question is how do I want to triumph in my future. I want to Triumph with my blogging, blogging and pinterest. I want to Triumph at work.I want my son to Triumph in his Studies and to become the greatest Chef he can be. I want to Triumph in every day life. I want my son and I to be successful in whatever we do.

Life is never easy but if you look back at the end of the day at how much you have already achieved then you are already victorious. You have already triumphed. Sometimes we have to make the best of life and our situations and triumph. We should always choose victory, we should always choose to triumph and the be best version of you, you can be.

Everyday ask yourself what did I do to Triumph and succeed today. 

Comment below and let me know if you could do anything and you knew you were never going to fail what would you do and how have you triumphed?. I would love to know.